how time flies!
     what have i been doing? college, which consumes most of my time. housesitting for an old man with four cats while he works in camp. hanging out with a crazy new friend lady, chain smoking, eating lots, trying to be merry while our worlds kind of crash down around us. lots of hot chocolate has been consumed.
     my final exams for my first semseter are this week! i've been dogging it, not really studying, it's hard to get my mind in that state. physics, chemistry, english, biology. so much science. it's mind boggling.
     i talk to the cats a lot. they're lovely little beings. i finished my friend's painting finally, i'm not good at doing things in a timely manner.
     i still like to sleep. i wish i could sleep more. winter is a time for sleeping, not stressing, i believe.
i think i am going to go sleep.

right. i'm set to start school in T minus 5 days. not gonna lie, i'm scared shitless. i think that my brain's deteriorated so much since high school that i'm just going to implode the second i walk into calculus. barf. oh well, i'm just gonna give'er so hard, not even have a social life, until i master this shizz and walk outta there with a  5.5 GPA and march my ass down to Vic for the big time show. ugh.
being so grown up kind of disgusts me.
i don't like it. it's scary. no more breaks, no exceptions, you're tried as an adult because YOU ARE AN ADULT. with bills to pay and responsibilities and jobs and relationships and cars and lifes and GROSS
nope. can i just call in sick to life?

sometimes

when i'm driving late at night and i get that lofty, dissociated feeling i drive down the hill by my house with no brakes and it feels like a roller coaster and i feel alive for just a moment when that sharpness hits my stomach

brainzz

sometimes i get really bad migraines.

my head just screams and i'm sore and tired and everything makes me want to cry.

like how i had to stay late at work because the till was off and then i didn't get to go on a hike and someone wants me to go out but i am broke and have to work in the morning and my boyfriend broke the cell phone i bought him two days ago and i can't get a hold of him and there's nothing in the fridge except for old hummus and some wrinkly mushrooms and a lot of condiments and pepperoni but i don't eat meat and i tell my mom there's nothing to eat and she says "oh but there's plenty" so i hide in my room with a pudding and a half can of pringles for my dinner and now my mom's on the phone complaining loudly about insignificant things and i want to shake her and tell her to open her eyes but she would never listen and

suddenly this seems to be about a bit more than a headache.

remember when i blogged

i think the problem here is that i was trying to run a serious blog and i am a very not serious person. so i'm going to try and resume writing on here, because writing is good for the soul, right? yeah. that's what i thought.

exhausted.

hi. i'm mishabelle. all i ever do is work and sleep and eat. but we're really broke so i eat a lot of kd. i'm on tumblr now a lot more. one day i'll actually accumulate enough interesting stuff to make a whole post about. ♥

by the way, here's some highlights of my trip to china.

i made a friend in the people's liberation army.

i got to see panda bears have lunch.

i saw so many historic structures i could puke.

i made a friend with ronaldo, the cruise ship's bartender.

i considered getting ice crem.

i pet a cat in a buddhist temple.

i got to explore snowy jade cave.

i got harassed by red butt monkeys!